Things I Never Expected I’d Do Once Married

I’m happy to introduce you to…my Husband. Who acts like a puppy.

So I meant to post a great gnocchi recipe all weekend, but unfortunately got a second degree burn on my right hand finger tips. Yeah, no fun at all. It’s kinda hard to type vigorously when you have a blister on your finger.

Don’t worry, I’ll post the gnocchi recipe tomorrow. I just figured I’d do something a bit less intensive (you’d be surprised how much work goes into writing recipes and incorporating pictures).

So I give you this: the list of things I never expected I’d do once married.

1) Hide all balls or spherical objects in the house. My husband will admit it himself and even be the first to say it….But his behaviors resemble that more of a puppy than a real boy. So don’t think I’m being mean when I say this. I seriously have had to hide EVERY single ball in the house, lest they be thrown at me, or at the wall or chased all around the house. The other day Hubs came in looking very confused, “Babe, have you seen my racquet ball?”

I paused, “Why no, honey. I haven’t seen anything round in days.”

Trust me. The world is much more peaceful this way. Let him rent his racquet balls from the gym like everyone else and keep me away from them.

2) Enjoy sweeping the floors. Our landlord revamped the house we moved into with brand new hard floors. Trust me when I say they are BEAU-TI-FUL. So, I like to use my swiffer and watch them shine. Yes, I know I’m weird. But when I realized that my swiffer had dusting AND mop extensions I got sooo excited— and then realized I am now officially old.

3) Clean better than the person I live with. I’m not a neat person. Ask my parents. Wait, no. Don’t do that. But it’s true. I will never admit to be the clean one anywhere— except at my house now. I’m not saying Hubs is dirty. In fact, no one folds or washes dishes better than him. However, dirty rooms or objects in our house are like ghosts. He doesn’t see them unless someone points it out to him or gets him to believe it. What’s even funnier is that if you ask him who the messy one is— he’ll tell you it’s me. We’re definitely not on the same page when it comes to home maintenance. But hey, it’s only been a month.

4) Realize that “love” and “like” do not have to coexist at the same time. I heard this before I got married and shrugged it off with a, “Poor bitter old people” thought. Jokes on me. It’s true. We’ll live it at that for now.

5) Enjoy cuddling as an actual past-time. Sure, we cuddled when we dated but usually when we went on dates— we went out. Now, we spend more time together in house than out of the house because…well….life happens everyday and going out is expensive. This means sometimes cuddling on the couch watching Melissa and Joey or Hell’s Kitchen is just what we both need to function properly.

6) Pack my husband’s lunches everyday. I actually don’t mind it…until he calls me “mom.” But I like knowing that the person I’m spending the rest of my life with is eating healthy meals three times a day and not just one big fast food run halfway through a day of classes. Today he came up to me and said the sweetest thing. “Babe! I just realized I hadn’t been hungry once since marrying you! And I’m eating HEALTHY!” Mission accomplished.

7) Write a blog where I admit that my husband is similar to a puppy in the first bullet point. Yeah…number one is haunting me. I just tripped on a ball in our room. -_-;

2 thoughts on “Things I Never Expected I’d Do Once Married

  1. too funny. You’d better hide the balls a little better, or maybe actually GET a puppy! Hubs sounds so sweet. I’m glad you’re feeding him well. Hope you get to do LOTS of cuddling.

    Love, Mamaw

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